How do I let go of negativity?

How do I let go of negativity?

We know that being positive has many benefits and can be transformative, but letting go of negativity and staying focused on the positives can be really challenging.

There is a tendency for us to cling onto people who affect us negatively; often hoping they will change, or we can help them change for the better. We stay in situations that damage our emotional and psychological well-being, in fear that there might not be anything else left for us outside of this thing we hold onto.

This could be staying at a job that we have no love for. It could be staying with an emotionally, psychologically, or even physically abusive partner. It could even be holding onto our own thoughts and emotions until it negatively affects our own mental and emotional state.

Many people do hold onto their thoughts and feelings for too long. This can cause resentment, damage our own well-being, and cause division between our friends, family, and colleagues. Letting go is not easy but with some effort, you can work towards maintaining a better emotional and mental state.

Focus on the present

Things that happen to and around us, and the thoughts and emotions that come with the situation are meant to be in the moment. They are temporary, and eventually will pass. After that you’re supposed to move on and live your life. When you hold onto a thought and feeling, you are dragging it back from the past into the present; allowing something that has already passed to affect you in the present. This doesn’t allow you much room to move forward when you keep holding onto the past.

Focus on the present, and what you need to do now. Keeping yourself busy is also a great way to stay in the present. Many people who have a lot of free time end up falling into the trap of ruminating and over-thinking.

Finding forgiveness

Often, holding onto something is due to our own hurt feelings. We may have felt slighted or wronged in some way and end up focussing on that. Interpersonal relationships come with conflicts that we have to deal with and resolve. Part of this is having the courage to seek a resolution. Instead of bottling up the negative feelings, talk about it, tell the person how you feel or confide in someone. Once you start dealing with your negative thoughts and emotions, it makes it easier to forgive the person or to forgive yourself for your own reaction or actions.

Keep in mind that people often don’t intentionally mean to slight us or hurt us. Sometimes we misinterpret intention. Sometimes we even misinterpret events to be something it never was. There are so many pitfalls that we can fall into.

Join us at College of Allied Educators to learn more about yourself, what motivates you, and how you can find happiness, meaning, and success in work, love, and life.

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Advanced Diploma in Counselling Psychology (ADICP) trains students to apply appropriate counselling skills in different situations while understanding their underlying theories. The ADICP programme introduces students to the nature of psychology and relates it to the theories and concepts of counselling. Students move on to explore themselves in order to promote personal growth and self-awareness, acquiring the key attributes of a competent counsellor and the proper methods of applying those skills.

Diploma in Counselling Psychology (DCPSY) is a counselling course covering a range of conceptual and functional skills in counselling. It trains students to apply appropriate counselling psychology skills in different situations, and equips students with the ability to work effectively as a counsellor.


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