Learning how to relax is something that seems like it should be easy, but in practice, can be incredibly difficult. A major problem is that stress, anxiety, deadlines, relationship complications, and money issues can all contribute to making it really difficult to relax.
Being able to relax is important for our mental and emotional health as it allows us to take our feet off the peddle, slow down, decompress, and absorb things in our life. That means being able to relax can allow us to digest new information and learn. It means that we’re more able to just enjoy our time, doing whatever it is we want to do in our leisure time.
Instead, what usually happens is we get stuck thinking about our problems from the day, and in many cases, problems that have been carried over that have not been resolved.
We always hear that we’re not supposed to carry our day’s burden home with us, but it happens. We go home and we’re still thinking about that deadline, or things that aren’t even all that important but it just hasn’t been finished yet. If we’re having a bad day, there is a tendency to carry that bad feeling with us as well. Then while trying to enjoy your meal, or trying to get some rest and sleep, we keep thinking and thinking about these things. It’s very possible that this even leads to a restless sleep. That then leads to being tired the next day and being unable to deal with the new day’s burden. It keeps building and building until we’re an emotional wreck.
It’s true that some people just seem to have a knack for being able to just dismiss their day away and enjoy the rest of their day and night, but for a lot of us, this feels unachievable.
However, there are things you can do to help.
Taking time to organise yourself.
I know it’s cliche, but being organised can really help how you manage yourself during the day. It will allow you an understanding of what it is that is on your plate, and what you need to do, and what can be left for another time. Essentially, being organised can help you better manage your time and this could very well help you compartmentalise. You don’t even have to be very organised. You just need to have some degree of organisation; enough for you to feel like you have some control over your day. Checklists and task manager apps can really help you get to that point, and while some may argue it’s not enough, I think having some degree of organisation is far better than not having any at all.
If you aren’t organised in any way, everything will feel chaotic and random, and it will be difficult to figure out where to start resolving your issues.
Taking time to address different concerns and responsibilities.
I get it, when things overwhelm us, there is a tendency to want to hide from it, pretend like it doesn’t exist, and we push it for another day. It helps us shift that stress and anxiety into the future, but at the same time, it really doesn’t last. The moment you have any amount of quiet time, these things will haunt you and you’ll face that anxiety knowing there’s something looming.
It’s worth considering taking some time to address those issues. It means, take some time to think about it, and take some concrete action and steps towards resolving your issues. If you’re behind on your bills, it really does help to acknowledge it, and then sit down to think about what to do about it. In a lot of these cases, it’s not even about the money, but you’ve just left things unaddressed for too long. You can give a call to the utility board and arrange a payment plan with them. It’s a solid start, and just taking a concrete step of action can immediately alleviate any dread you may have been feeling.
I’m not saying you can or should try to address everything all at once, but doing something and taking some steps forward on some issues can help alleviate the stress and anxiety that’s making it hard for you to rest and sleep properly. Over time, addressing your issues in small amounts, can really add up to a lot. The feeling of ease can be quite immediate because you’ll feel like you have some level of control over your life.
At the end of the day, we can always push things for another day, but this just ends up building up a backlog of things we know we need to do but haven’t done. You’re just not going to be able to sleep peacefully with that over your head. Taking small steps to address your responsibilities can have immense and immediate effect on your peace of mind.
Even saying that, it still requires some degree of personal control and accountability. That’s a difficult thing for some people. There’s nothing wrong with that as long as you realise it and take the time to work on yourself so you can be a better version. After all, happiness doesn’t just drop on our laps. We’re also responsible for how that comes about.
Join us at College of Allied Educators to learn more about yourself, what motivates you, and how you can find happiness, meaning, and success in work, love, and life.
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