It may seem a little odd to be asked who you’re trying to find happiness for because the assumption we’d broadly make is that we’re trying to find happiness for ourselves. That seems obvious and evident, but for a lot of people, this may not be the case. It could be that many people who are searching for happiness are doing it for someone else and assuming that search is for themselves. That could be you and you may not even be clued in on it.
In this sense, the search for happiness can be quite complex because it’s difficult to tell who you’re finding happiness for.
Maybe you’re devoted to your partner, and you’ve spent all this time trying to make your partner happy. Maybe you’re working in social services, counselling, or committing your personal time to helping others as a means to help them find comfort and a piece of happiness. We know that making others happy can be effective in making us happy as well. This service towards other people’s happiness can pave a way for you to find your own happiness. Sometimes though, you can get lost along the way and forget what it is you’re trying to do.
You may end up not seeing where your happiness starts and where other people’s happiness ends or vice versa. You may end up confused, going through the motions, and expecting an outcome for which you’re not properly focussed towards. This can lead to burn out, cynicism, or despondency.
Oftentimes, we forget that happiness isn’t something we can make happen for other people. It’s far easier to make it comfortable for people, but happiness isn’t a formula you can work out for someone else. They have their own ideas of what happiness is and it could very well be that they aren’t yet at the right mindset to accept it into their lives at the time.
This is something you will encounter often as someone who cares about other people.
The same thing applies to your own life as well. No matter how many books you’ve read or studied, there is no magic formula that’s going to help you find your happiness. Sometimes, you can even end up searching and miss out totally on your own opportunities for happiness; especially if you are the type who is always trying to help other people.
If you are the type of person who has an interest in helping others, this is something you have to actively work on for yourself. You have to learn to accept that you require as much time and effort examining your own life and needs as the people you’re trying to help find their comfort or happiness.
You have unique life challenges, and you deserve the space, time, and energy to devote to looking after yourself. Making sure you’re balanced, and happy, is as important as making sure others happy.
Join us at College of Allied Educators to learn more about yourself, what motivates you, and how you can find happiness, meaning, and success in work, love, and life.
- POSTGRADUATE DIPLOMA IN COUNSELLING PSYCHOLOGY
Postgraduate Diploma in Counselling Psychology (PGDICP) is a counselling psychology course accredited by the Singapore Association for Counselling (SAC). The part-time Postgraduate Diploma in Counselling Psychology programme focuses on developing and enhancing experiential knowledge and skills through a holistic approach. Some of the subjects covered include Counselling Children, Addiction Intervention, Crisis Intervention, and Family Therapy. - ADVANCED DIPLOMA IN COUNSELLING PSYCHOLOGY
Advanced Diploma in Counselling Psychology (ADICP) trains students to apply appropriate counselling skills in different situations while understanding their underlying theories. The ADICP programme introduces students to the nature of psychology and relates it to the theories and concepts of counselling. Students move on to explore themselves in order to promote personal growth and self-awareness, acquiring the key attributes of a competent counsellor and the proper methods of applying those skills.
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