Stress is something we all have to deal with. It is our body’s signal to be wary of danger or threats. Your heart rate may increase, your palms may get sweaty, your senses get more acute, and you gain more energy as hormones flood your body in preparation to deal with the looming problem or threat. Stress is a natural.

Good listening is empathic listening; defined as a way of listening and responding to another person that improves mutual understanding and trust. It allows us to receive and accurately interpret the speaker’s message, hence able to provide an appropriate response. This is an important skill to master for both personal and professional interactions. When an individual feels understood, an emotional burden is lifted, stress and defensiveness will reduce. Hence as an empathic listener, you empower the speaker to an increased self-esteem and clarity.

Empathic listening comprises two crucial aspects – Active and Reflective Listening.

Active listening is mindful hearing and genuine effort to comprehend what’s spoken by the other. Attentiveness is the key factor. Reflective listening focuses on reflecting the speaker’s words and feelings by giving feedback through a “paraphrased rendition”; the interpretation confirms and assures that the speaker is heard and understood.

5 TIPS TO INCREASE YOUR LISTENING ABILITIES:

Be Fully In The Moment – Paying attention not just to the words but tone, facial expressions and body language for cues on how they are really feeling. Good eye contact is necessary to convey engagement.

Put Yourself In Their Shoes – Imagine yourself in their situation. Empathy is the ability to project oneself into the personality of another person in order to better understand his/ her emotions.

Do Not Interrupt – Don’t dominate the conversation or impose your ideas on the person. Encourage them to express themselves more instead.

Paraphrase Main Points & Restate them – Echoing what the speaker said allows needed clarification and also assures the speaker that he/she is understood and heard correctly.

Adopt An Attitude of Unconditional Regard – Unconditional positive regard is accepting the speaker totally for who he or she is without evaluating or censoring; and disapproving of particular feelings, actions or characteristics. It liberates the speaker to express him or herself freely.

The ability to listen is one of the most crucial skills of a counsellor. When you are able to truly listen, you learn to empathise, and you learn to sympathise with people around you. It changes the way you perceive the world and informs the way you are able to help.

Join us at College of Allied Educators to learn more about the limits of your abilities and discover how you can help others overcome their doubts, fears, disagreements, and challenges in order to build a happier, more meaningful life.

• POSTGRADUATE DIPLOMA IN COUNSELLING PSYCHOLOGY Postgraduate Diploma in Counselling Psychology (PGDICP) is a counselling psychology course accredited by the Singapore Association for Counselling (SAC). The part-time Postgraduate Diploma in Counselling Psychology programme focuses on developing and enhancing experiential knowledge and skills through a holistic approach. Some of the subjects covered include Counselling Children, Addiction Intervention, Crisis Intervention, and Family Therapy.
• DIPLOMA IN COUNSELLING PSYCHOLOGY Diploma in Counselling Psychology (DCPSY) is a counselling course covering a range of conceptual and functional skills in counselling. It trains students to apply appropriate counselling psychology skills in different situations, and equips students with the ability to work effectively as a counsellor.

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We seem to know at least someone that everyone goes to for advice. It’s usually a friend but sometimes it may be a sibling, mother, or father. These people are the ones that you always feel naturally drawn to when you have some concern or need to unburden yourself with the worries of the day.

When people think about loneliness, some may think of someone who is alone all the time; but being lonely and being alone are different things. Being alone is a physical state where a person could be by themselves a lot of the time.

This doesn’t necessarily mean they are lonely. Some people have less need to be around other people and are quite comfortable to be themselves, and even to do things by themselves. Being lonely is a feeling that you need people but for whatever reason, don’t have access to them. It is a feeling of isolation. Sometimes being alone can also be lonely. There are different types of loneliness that you can face:

Over the course of any given day thousands of people will be seeing a therapist, social worker, or counsellor, and many will be given a mental health diagnosis for the first time as well.

Finding the time and putting effort to look after yourself may seem selfish. Especially for people who have an innate calling to help other people, helping themselves may be the furthest thing from their minds. It is often seen as a selfish thing to do. Even in this day and age when we should know better, you still might feel that way. Due to this reasoning, many people who have a natural affinity to help others often don’t look after themselves.

It may often feel like it, but having some amount of self-doubt is perfectly normal and doesn’t make you a negative person. Self-doubt is that feeling that you aren’t good enough or you aren’t doing something right, so you end up second guessing yourself. In many cases, this can end up backfiring and sabotaging your success.

It’s often said that loneliness can kill. It’s something people often forget but loneliness can absolutely be a bad thing. Loneliness and isolation have been linked to high blood pressure, anxiety, depression, and sometimes even death. It’s reasonable to assume that being alone isn’t such a good thing. However, being alone and being lonely aren’t necessarily the same things.