When you don’t have confidence in yourself, we say you have low self-esteem; but knowing that doesn’t really help you in any way. It’s like knowing you have a problem and that’s really it.
Self-confidence is not something most people sit down to define. They just assume they know it, assume they have it (or lack of it). It is a mindset and attitude you have about yourself regarding your abilities and traits. It is very much your attitude about yourself.
People who lack confidence may constantly overthink and second-guess themselves to the point of becoming paralysed with fear and anxiety. This can lead to an inability to make important life or career decisions, failure to perform properly at work or at home, and possibly even a failure of important personal relationships.
If you are self-confident, you trust yourself. You trust your ability to do things. You trust your decision making abilities. You trust yourself to succeed. You have faith in yourself.
Most people aren’t self-confident all the time. They may second-guess themselves, and sometimes overthink and stress over their actions, but confident people quickly overcome these obstacles. They have healthy ways of thinking about themselves, and the way they see the world supports that. They may have learned to develop healthy mental tools and habits that they apply to every day life.
Self-esteem is often used interchangeably with self-confidence but they are different. Self-esteem is how much you value yourself. It does overlap and influences your self-confidence; but you can have a healthy dose of self-esteem and still lack self-confidence depending on how many negative mental habits you have formed.
Your self-confidence is mental. It does require that you have some regard for yourself, but maintaining it requires a healthy mind, and a healthy process in dealing with the world.
You really need to understand yourself in order to access a more confidence self. You need to know and understand who you are as a person, what you have to offer, and the skills you are able to utilise and bring to the table. It’s tricky because at any point you can probably say and think yourself to be confident, but when it comes time to perform and make decisions, you end up freezing.
Maybe you’ve encountered such a situation. You feel you’ve earned a promotion at work, but when it comes time to ask for it, you sit on it and don’t act. Likely you’ve made excuses that maybe you haven’t really earned it. You could have missed opportunities in love and relationships because you ended up second guessing things when they were going well, and didn’t take the opportunity to secure the relationship.
When you understand yourself and what makes you tick, you’ll start to learn why you’re not as confident as you really need to be to take life by the horns and truly find success for yourself.
Join us at College of Allied Educators to learn more about yourself, what motivates you, and how you can find happiness, meaning, and success in work, love, and life.
- POSTGRADUATE DIPLOMA IN COUNSELLING PSYCHOLOGY
Postgraduate Diploma in Counselling Psychology (PGDICP) is a counselling psychology course accredited by the Singapore Association for Counselling (SAC). The part-time Postgraduate Diploma in Counselling Psychology programme focuses on developing and enhancing experiential knowledge and skills through a holistic approach. Some of the subjects covered include Counselling Children, Addiction Intervention, Crisis Intervention, and Family Therapy. - ADVANCED DIPLOMA IN COUNSELLING PSYCHOLOGY
Advanced Diploma in Counselling Psychology (ADICP) trains students to apply appropriate counselling skills in different situations while understanding their underlying theories. The ADICP programme introduces students to the nature of psychology and relates it to the theories and concepts of counselling. Students move on to explore themselves in order to promote personal growth and self-awareness, acquiring the key attributes of a competent counsellor and the proper methods of applying those skills. - DIPLOMA IN COUNSELLING PSYCHOLOGY
Diploma in Counselling Psychology (DCPSY) is a counselling course covering a range of conceptual and functional skills in counselling. It trains students to apply appropriate counselling psychology skills in different situations, and equips students with the ability to work effectively as a counsellor.
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