When we are guilty of having done or said something that hurt or inconvenienced people around us, an apology is often offered. However, many people do have problems apologising even when they know they need to. An apology is meant to take responsibility for our actions and ask for forgiveness. In most cases, people are quick to forgive when the apology is sincere. Read more
counselling psychology
Why is it so difficult to say sorry?
An apology is an acknowledgement that we caused harm, discomfort, or inconvenience to someone. It is an opportunity to resolve our interpersonal conflicts and interactions. A genuine apology can almost immediately clear anger, ill-feelings, and even solve some measure of distrust. Saying “sorry” is something most children are taught and learn, and should be easy enough for adults to do; but apologising seems to be incredibly difficult for some people. Read more
Are you guilty of unearned guilt?
Guilt is the feeling of having caused harm or inconvenience to someone in some way. Guilt is actually quite important to regulating our social behaviour but some people can suffer from chronic guilt and in some cases, some suffer from unearned guilt.
Unearned guilt is a type of self-inflicted harm that takes responsibility for things that may be completely out of the person’s control. It is a burden that will eventually weigh on the shoulders and eventually will consume the person to such an extent they no longer have any room left to care for themselves.
Is guilt holding you back?
Some people may describe guilt as the feeling of having done something wrong, illegal, unethical, criminal or immoral. While guilt may have different explanations and descriptions, it is best described as the feeling of having caused harm or inconvenience to someone in some way. Read more
The Benefits of listening
Listening is a skill that not only helps and serves others, it conditions us to become more compassionate, patient and nurturing people. It takes us out of our tendency toward self absorption and self interest, connecting us intrinsically with the world around us. When we listen, we develop new points of view, perspectives and insight and at the same time foster connections that confers trust and respect. Read more
Do you love yourself as much as you love others?
Do you often find yourself being there for your friends, cheering them up and motivating them towards self-betterment? They might have even taken your advice to heart, made adjustments and had tremendous improvement in their lives. Maybe you just provided comfort and a listening ear. Either way, you make a difference to people.
Meanwhile you’re going home feeling empty when you should be feeling good after helping your friend. This could signal a lack of self-love and a lack of appreciation of your own worth and value. But how do you know if you lack self-love? Read more
Need to talk?
CAE has counsellors ready and willing to listen to you. They are compassionate and trained with the College of Allied Educators to listen to any topic or concern you may have. All conversations are kept in the strictest of confidence.
Do you appreciate the people around you?
Relationships often go on autopilot after a while. Honeymoon phases end and a certain routine sets in. It’s just one of those facts of life; but for some it can be the beginning of the end of the relationship. One thing that can help keep a relationship alive and vital is appreciation. By appreciating the people around you, and learning how to appreciate yourself, you can keep a happy and healthy relationship going; whether it is a romantic relationship or a friendship. Read more
Positivity is attractive
Think about all the times someone was unexpectedly friendly or nice to you. Maybe it’s that person that smiles at you in the morning. Maybe it’s a cheerful good morning even when nothing is said first. Maybe it’s the person that strikes up a conversation and pays you an unexpected compliment. Read more
How much self-doubt is too much?
If we accept that confidence is hugely beneficial to success at whatever task we set ourselves to, then self-doubt must be quite detrimental to success. That would be the most likely conclusion and maybe even the consensus among people in general. Read more